Ready and Waitng

I was not created to wait. I do everything quickly. I am a problem solver. I am a go getter. If there is an end then I will find a way to get there. However, starting a family has been nothing but a waiting game. While we were trying to get pregnant, you waited through your cycle. Looking for the signs of ovulation and then waiting for the dreaded "time of the month" only to be crampy and bloated. Then the waiting would start all over.

Then we went to a doctor. We took lots of test and alas... more waiting. Waiting for results, consultations, recommendations, and then the bill to it all. We decided that was not the route for us. So we then started researching adoption agencies. We finally decided on CHI and applied. Low and behold we had to wait again. I had to turn 25 before they would accept us. It was only a few weeks away but it was more waiting.

Then we finally got all of the paper work done, got it turned in and some of it was older than 6 months and had to be done again. So round two was finally finished and the turned in our gigantic Dossier to our agency. We were actually on the official waiting list, which was supposed to be 4-6 months. Well ten months later, we were still waiting and and that was when we first laid eyes on our beautiful sons. Unfortunately someone else saw them that same day and requested their information. So I felt it was a sign and that we were meant to continue waiting until our family was ready.

A month later our sons were back on the list and we prayed. This was the first time I didn't mind waiting. I knew God was working and talking to us. Every time I opened the Bible there was more scripture that pointed the direction we were meant to go. Two weeks later we knew without a shadow of a doubt that these boys were meant to be ours.

We accepted the referral only to be told there was more waiting. We would wait on our social worker, and then the agency to have some of our paperwork changed over. Another 3 weeks passed and we officially accepted the referral. The next set of wait time was 3-4 months. This was to be until we were able to actually pick up our kiddos. Well BS. It will be longer. There has been one unforeseen delay after another. Every time we talk with our case worker she is "confident I will have good news for you soon." Well I guess soon is relative. I want good news like five weeks ago. It has now been 10 1/2 weeks and I am sick of waiting. We are the last to get a court date. The only kids not moved to the HOH. Our boys are getting older every day! The time is now. We have waited, we have been patient, we have been kind.

It is time for some people to get the lead out of somewhere and get the paperwork done. We are done waiting. The boys have got to be done waiting. IT IS TIME!!! So please pray for good news soon. Even if it's just that they were moved. There is another family traveling in less than 10 days and it would be great if we could get some updated pictures. It would make it feel real. Right now it feels like we are being duped. I know we aren't, but despair is seeking in.

We keep seeing others get court dates, and we are excited for them we really are, but it is frustrating to be passed up. If you are still reading my complaints... thank you. If not I understand. There has been a lot of grumbling lately. I guess I was created to wait after all, whether I like it or not. Somethings are not in my hands. Nothing is really.