Today was my first Mother's Day. There was a mix of emotions that went with today. While obvious joy and praise is given to God for our children; there is a subtle mourning for Ayme. I am a mother because my boy's mother is no longer living. The morning went really smooth. Got up, the boys brought me coffee and their gifts and we got ready for church. I was asked to speak about God's victory throughout our adoption and our story to parenthood. The boys went to their classrooms where they talked about moms and everything they are thankful for.

After church there was a noticable mood change in our eldest. I had a feeling he was thinking about Ayme, his momma. We got home and readied a picnic in which he was refusing to participate in. I sat with him. He wouldn't let me hold him or look me in the eye. I asked him of he was sad and he didn't respond. I tried to get him to tell me why but he wasn't using words. So I asked if it was because he missed his mother. Scared to make me sad, he didn't respond. So I told him we would pray to Jesus and ask Jesus to tell her thank you and happy mothers day. I am not an eloquent pray-er. But Gods words flowed through us and it was the closest I had felt to my sons. I know she is in heaven watching her sons grow every day. And she is proud of how smart and brave her sons are. So I am honored to share this Mothers Day with her. She raised her sons to be respectful an to love God with their heart, mind, and soul.

Thank you God. We don't know why there is hurt and pain, but thank you for your comfort. We pray that your patience and love shine through us and our sons continue to grow in you. And God, tell their Mother that we will protect them, and love them, feed them, educate them and tell her thank you for everything she had done for them. We love her always and she will always be a part of our family.